Since March, I have been taking many long drives that inevitably several friends and family members, including my mother, raised the question, why so many road trips and alone at that? Behind this curiosity, I guess, is the suspicion that I am up to something. My standard answer has always been: I just need to be away. Manila is just too dirty and suffocating. It's more peaceful in the province. The sights and sounds are pleasant and less stressful.
It's true. The Philippines is a beautiful country and until now I am humbled by what I see and hear. The sunrise in Baguio's Mines View Park, the sunset in Calatagan, Batangas. The furious waves of Pagudpud that sound like torrential rain. The orchestra of frogs in Lucena, Quezon that can be mistaken for a flock of migratory geese as it plays once night sets in and lasts until two hours before dawn.About a month ago, a girl friend from the University asked me the same question. Maybe, she was just being polite to follow her initial query with: is anything wrong with you? She's been very good to me while we were studying in the University of the Philippines and I haven't seen her as much as I wanted after stepping out of Diliman. Because of that friendship, I asked for time so I can give the full answer she deserves. I haven't found the time until now.
Sierra Madre Night, Baler Sunrise
I love long drives. Pushing the machine, testing what it can and can't do gives me a kick that others may get from alcohol or some other substance. The high doesn’t come only from the chance to drive at a fast speed. There's joy in mastering and respecting the machine so it will respond exactly the way I want. Add this: I can listen to a wide variety of music, from classical to rock, and anything in between. I play Beethoven and Mozart. It's not just Aegis, Sampaguita, or Malmsteen that go with me in these trips. I also listen to Pavarotti, Sinatra. Les Miserables, depending on the mood, lifts the driving experience to another level.I won't deny that I like the rush of speed. I was on top of the world when it took me just five hours to drive from Vigan, Ilocos Sur to Manila. I won't deny too the sense of accomplishment when I drove thru northeast and northwest of Luzon in 10 days: Manila to Baler in Aurora province; Baler to Banawe passing through Quirino province; Banawe to Sagada through the scenic and rough roads of Halsema Highway; Sagada to Besang Pass in Cervantes, Ilocos Sur then to Vigan; Vigan to Laog and Pagudpud in Ilocos Norte; then to Aparri in Cagayan; then to Cabagan, Isabela where I spent most of most of my elementary; then to my grandmother's hometown Naguilian, also in Isabela; and then back to Manila passing through the provinces of Nueva Vizcaya, Nueva Ecija and Bulacan. I have also taken similar trips with the route from Manila to Ilocos then around the north tip of Luzon to Isabela then Quirino to get to the surfing town of Baler. Once, I even drove night time through the Sierra Madre, the only route I knew then, so I can catch the sunrise in Baler.
Search for Answers
Long drives also help empty and clear the mind. As I speed down the highway, my mind slowly gets rid of garbage and then concentrates on the condition of the road and the machine. At some point, the mind is one with the road and the vehicle. And then the mind's awareness expands and suddenly I am reminded of those that matter, the essentials and necessities. I am also joined by ghosts from the past.Behind the wheel I am reminded of where I came from, of the journey that took me to where I am. I remember my dreams and aspirations when I was still an innocent elementary student in the province; the laughter, heartbreaks and sense of invincibility when I was a high school student in a Catholic school in Manila; the doubts and slow erosion of idealism when I was studying Economics and History in U.P. I am also reminded of my successes and shortcomings in my work and relationships. I remember my first crush. I recall what I have given up as I travelled to my here and now. In these trips, I find myself trying to answer if these ideals I surrendered were worth abandoning. I don't always find the answers and maybe that's why I continue to take road trips. And when I get all the answers, if at all that ever comes, I know I will still grab and create opportunities so that I can be on the road for days.
Spiritual, Enlightenment
I was told that that during a weekend lunch at my mother's home my frequent road trips this year came up in a discussion. My mother was curious and apparently worried. My younger brother told her that maybe I go on these travels because it could be that there's something spiritual for me. I never thought of myself as spiritual. I don’t go to church and I can't remember my last conversation with God. But my brother is probably right.These trips don’t open the gates of heaven. They don’t bring me to enlightenment. These trips allow me though to inspect and reboot myself. At the end of each trip, I look at myself. I am not an attractive sight but I see a person at peace and more certain than before the journey started. Unfortunately, this afterglow doesn’t last. It's shredded by the daily grind of making a living that nothing's left, like waking from a dream. So, again I hit the road.
Appreciation, Exploration, Conversations
At first, the urge to hit the road wasn’t all like that. I took trips simply for the pleasure of driving and pushing the machine. I reach my destination, look if it's a good place and make a mental note. That's it. Later on, I took trips because I want to drive through the mountains, the terraces, pass through rough roads, cross rivers. I started to appreciate the scenery and observe places that I have only read and heard about. From mere appreciation, I started to explore. And from exploration, I began to strike up conversations with fellow travelers, locals, hotel and restaurant staff, owners of the resorts where I stay or I dine, empanada vendors, tricycle drivers. I am in touch with some of those I have met. Maybe, we will become friends.Previous to this year's trips, I mostly shunned conversations. Now, I am aware of how much I have missed in my previous travels. A journey becomes more fulfilling by engaging the people you meet on the road, those you find at your destination, the staff who served your food or coffee, the worker at the shop where you bought items that you bring home. They have compelling stories.I met a cook in a hole in the wall restaurant that's by the sea in Padre Burgos, Quezon. She's from the north, unschooled in culinary arts, and picked up her skill because she had to prepare meals for her family. She got a good break that allowed her to expand from the basic. She's a single mother, raised and sent her daughter to a nursing school by sweating out in the kitchen. Her daughter is now working overseas and promised to build her a home of their own. I got to know two girls, a 15-year-old and her 16-year old cousin, running a store that sells dried fish by the Maharlika road in Rosario, La Union. It was past midnight and raining, yet these girls were working for the store owner to earn money for school supplies. The younger girl along with two other siblings were abandoned by their mother before their father died from illness. They are being raised by a grandmother. The 15-year old girl is smart and a math whiz. Her older cousin, who is also as smart, was listing and computing the items I bought. The younger took a quick look at the list and in five seconds flat correctly figured what I owed. Both girls were very good at making a sales pitch. I ended up buying more than planned. The grandmother and the cousin told me that the 15-year old has won school awards and honors.There are so many stories.A young surfer couple based in the U.S. decided to return to the Philippines, they built the first resort in Maira-ira, Pagudpud long before the government started paving the road in that area. They made the jump after hearing people older than them lament on missed opportunities: I should have done this or that because it's what I really wanted. A single mother, raising two children through honest living as a waitress in a resort after her husband was shot dead by mistake. A chef, who hasn't gone to culinary school, but had the courage to just show up and the drive to improve his craft with every honest opportunity that comes his way. And even now that he's head chef at a resort, the drive to do better is still there. As they share me their stories, my horizon only expands. There are also bar girls, who repeat similar story lines that you'd think it was lifted from one script: driven by poverty, single mother, the only breadwinner of an entire family. Sometimes, as a bar girl narrates her financial difficulty, I wonder if she is supporting an entire barangay instead of a nuclear family.
First Road Trip
I had my first road trip in May 2000, when I acquired the Vitara that I still drive until now. The trip was to Pagudpud and my companions then were my mother, step father, two brothers and three sisters. Many road trips followed and then at some point I stopped. I took a detour, a very personal kind if I must say. Things weren’t also really doing well for me at work. During this hiatus, I continued dreaming that one day I will just hop into Christine, as I have called my ever loyal Vitara, and drive throughout the Philippines. I chose not to pursue this dream of Aparri to Jolo by land so I can take care of the circumstances I was faced then at work and personally. Looking back, road trips would have probably done me more good than harm. The Philippines by land is still on the table. I am just waiting for the right time like when I have saved enough for gasoline.I have not always been drawn to road trips. I remember hating those grueling 10-hour trips from Isabela to Manila when my lola sends me and my sister to spend summer or Christmas in the capital. Those trips were a reward of sorts for doing well in school. It's also because she didn’t want us to be left behind by the developments in Manila. She was always forward-looking and this was her way of phasing us into the next stage. Cabagan, Isabela is peaceful and convenient. I know a number of families in that sleepy town but we will soon study in Manila, which admittedly had better schools. We mostly took private vehicles during these trips and when that's not possible we rode the bus, which was more taxing. I get nauseated and even threw up in some of these trips. Later on, I came to like and look forward to these trips. Manila, after all, is glitzy and modern. So, the seed of my love affair with long drives was planted and slowly grew its roots when I took Isabela-Manila/Manila-Isabela trips with my mother's eldest brother. My uncle, who then had a Toyota Crown, shared with me stories about places that he has visited both for work and leisure. I never got the chance to go with him in his travels to these other places. Still, the experience of these trips with him took hold. His car was always clean and comfortable that it's like being home on wheels. From these trips, I picked up the practice of knocking the soles of my footwear against each other before getting into a vehicle so that I don't bring in dust, mud and pebbles. I learned to always clean the car regularly and always after a road trip. He also stops at the best places to eat, a mix of fancy and hole in the wall that serve clean and tasty dishes.
Baguio, Sagada, Vigan
The mind is a wonderful machine. It knows what its person wants even though that person is unaware of those desires. When I acquired the Vitara in 2000, road trips weren’t in my mind at all. I needed a vehicle for work. I don't mind commuting but traffic and long work hours affected my efficiency. I didn’t choose a sedan because it didn’t fit my personality. I also didn’t want a sedan because Manila gets flooded. It was a stretch on the budget but I knew the vehicle has to be brand new. I was scared of a second hand as I imagined it to be unreliable and prone to breakdowns. I also surmised I won't be able to afford a vehicle again so it should be new and sturdy that maintained devotedly will last a long time. I realized just recently that I bought a machine meant for road trips. My subconscious was already enamored with road trips 13 years ago and I had no clue. I was fortunate that my work enabled me to buy a reliable road warrior. Prior to 2013, I made two short trips to Baguio, a trip to Sagada before that and followed by a quick run to Vigan months or a year after. My dormant love affair with road trips wasn't contained long enough. This year, it broke out of the cage. Since I am still able and young, I am letting the beast run and see where it gets me. I have also picked up photography as a hobby. I am taking this seriously now than before and I realized that I am better at it when I am somewhere outside Manila, away from its so many distractions.
Alone, Photography, Home
I am alone in most of my road trips this year and it's not for lack of good companions. I enjoy travelling with a companion. You have a navigator, someone to keep you awake, someone to help you change the CD as you drive and someone to share coffee or meals with. Conversation quality is also a lot better than hanging out in a bar. And if you get engine trouble, well you have a pair of extra hands. I prefer taking long drives alone though. I tend to think better. I don’t have to worry about stopping for food. I can skip meals and it doesn’t bother me one bit. I also have more time in taking photos. I am far from mastering my camera. Four years into this hobby, taking good photos is still a hit and miss. It's very frustrating but I prefer to figure out photography on my own.I like staying home, locked up in the bedroom, buried under my books and movies. It's a small and comfortable place that while disorganized is quiet. The house is stacked with all the food and drinks I want. And should I crave something else it's quite near a number of establishments that have what I seek. The rooms I stay in my trips are comfortable only because these have elements that remind me of home. These rooms will never match the security, convenience and level of comfort of staying under the sheets on my own bed. Yet, I keep taking road trips. I have heard others says that a place you can't get out of is called a jail. I guess I leave before the house becomes a prison. Still, all my road trips had only one ending. The best part of a journey, for me, is returning home.
I am Icarus
Like Icarus to his sun, I will always be attracted by the road, ever curious where it leads, excited over what's in store before reaching its end. I am still far from flying too close to the sun that melted the wax Icarus used to bind the bird feathers and create his wings. I am aware that I might just reach that point. Should I share the fate of Icarus and never to return home, I make it a point to have no unfinished business before leaving for a trip.
Sierra Madre Night, Baler Sunrise
I love long drives. Pushing the machine, testing what it can and can't do gives me a kick that others may get from alcohol or some other substance. The high doesn’t come only from the chance to drive at a fast speed. There's joy in mastering and respecting the machine so it will respond exactly the way I want. Add this: I can listen to a wide variety of music, from classical to rock, and anything in between. I play Beethoven and Mozart. It's not just Aegis, Sampaguita, or Malmsteen that go with me in these trips. I also listen to Pavarotti, Sinatra. Les Miserables, depending on the mood, lifts the driving experience to another level.I won't deny that I like the rush of speed. I was on top of the world when it took me just five hours to drive from Vigan, Ilocos Sur to Manila. I won't deny too the sense of accomplishment when I drove thru northeast and northwest of Luzon in 10 days: Manila to Baler in Aurora province; Baler to Banawe passing through Quirino province; Banawe to Sagada through the scenic and rough roads of Halsema Highway; Sagada to Besang Pass in Cervantes, Ilocos Sur then to Vigan; Vigan to Laog and Pagudpud in Ilocos Norte; then to Aparri in Cagayan; then to Cabagan, Isabela where I spent most of most of my elementary; then to my grandmother's hometown Naguilian, also in Isabela; and then back to Manila passing through the provinces of Nueva Vizcaya, Nueva Ecija and Bulacan. I have also taken similar trips with the route from Manila to Ilocos then around the north tip of Luzon to Isabela then Quirino to get to the surfing town of Baler. Once, I even drove night time through the Sierra Madre, the only route I knew then, so I can catch the sunrise in Baler.
Search for Answers
Long drives also help empty and clear the mind. As I speed down the highway, my mind slowly gets rid of garbage and then concentrates on the condition of the road and the machine. At some point, the mind is one with the road and the vehicle. And then the mind's awareness expands and suddenly I am reminded of those that matter, the essentials and necessities. I am also joined by ghosts from the past.Behind the wheel I am reminded of where I came from, of the journey that took me to where I am. I remember my dreams and aspirations when I was still an innocent elementary student in the province; the laughter, heartbreaks and sense of invincibility when I was a high school student in a Catholic school in Manila; the doubts and slow erosion of idealism when I was studying Economics and History in U.P. I am also reminded of my successes and shortcomings in my work and relationships. I remember my first crush. I recall what I have given up as I travelled to my here and now. In these trips, I find myself trying to answer if these ideals I surrendered were worth abandoning. I don't always find the answers and maybe that's why I continue to take road trips. And when I get all the answers, if at all that ever comes, I know I will still grab and create opportunities so that I can be on the road for days.
Spiritual, Enlightenment
I was told that that during a weekend lunch at my mother's home my frequent road trips this year came up in a discussion. My mother was curious and apparently worried. My younger brother told her that maybe I go on these travels because it could be that there's something spiritual for me. I never thought of myself as spiritual. I don’t go to church and I can't remember my last conversation with God. But my brother is probably right.These trips don’t open the gates of heaven. They don’t bring me to enlightenment. These trips allow me though to inspect and reboot myself. At the end of each trip, I look at myself. I am not an attractive sight but I see a person at peace and more certain than before the journey started. Unfortunately, this afterglow doesn’t last. It's shredded by the daily grind of making a living that nothing's left, like waking from a dream. So, again I hit the road.
Appreciation, Exploration, Conversations
At first, the urge to hit the road wasn’t all like that. I took trips simply for the pleasure of driving and pushing the machine. I reach my destination, look if it's a good place and make a mental note. That's it. Later on, I took trips because I want to drive through the mountains, the terraces, pass through rough roads, cross rivers. I started to appreciate the scenery and observe places that I have only read and heard about. From mere appreciation, I started to explore. And from exploration, I began to strike up conversations with fellow travelers, locals, hotel and restaurant staff, owners of the resorts where I stay or I dine, empanada vendors, tricycle drivers. I am in touch with some of those I have met. Maybe, we will become friends.Previous to this year's trips, I mostly shunned conversations. Now, I am aware of how much I have missed in my previous travels. A journey becomes more fulfilling by engaging the people you meet on the road, those you find at your destination, the staff who served your food or coffee, the worker at the shop where you bought items that you bring home. They have compelling stories.I met a cook in a hole in the wall restaurant that's by the sea in Padre Burgos, Quezon. She's from the north, unschooled in culinary arts, and picked up her skill because she had to prepare meals for her family. She got a good break that allowed her to expand from the basic. She's a single mother, raised and sent her daughter to a nursing school by sweating out in the kitchen. Her daughter is now working overseas and promised to build her a home of their own. I got to know two girls, a 15-year-old and her 16-year old cousin, running a store that sells dried fish by the Maharlika road in Rosario, La Union. It was past midnight and raining, yet these girls were working for the store owner to earn money for school supplies. The younger girl along with two other siblings were abandoned by their mother before their father died from illness. They are being raised by a grandmother. The 15-year old girl is smart and a math whiz. Her older cousin, who is also as smart, was listing and computing the items I bought. The younger took a quick look at the list and in five seconds flat correctly figured what I owed. Both girls were very good at making a sales pitch. I ended up buying more than planned. The grandmother and the cousin told me that the 15-year old has won school awards and honors.There are so many stories.A young surfer couple based in the U.S. decided to return to the Philippines, they built the first resort in Maira-ira, Pagudpud long before the government started paving the road in that area. They made the jump after hearing people older than them lament on missed opportunities: I should have done this or that because it's what I really wanted. A single mother, raising two children through honest living as a waitress in a resort after her husband was shot dead by mistake. A chef, who hasn't gone to culinary school, but had the courage to just show up and the drive to improve his craft with every honest opportunity that comes his way. And even now that he's head chef at a resort, the drive to do better is still there. As they share me their stories, my horizon only expands. There are also bar girls, who repeat similar story lines that you'd think it was lifted from one script: driven by poverty, single mother, the only breadwinner of an entire family. Sometimes, as a bar girl narrates her financial difficulty, I wonder if she is supporting an entire barangay instead of a nuclear family.
First Road Trip
I had my first road trip in May 2000, when I acquired the Vitara that I still drive until now. The trip was to Pagudpud and my companions then were my mother, step father, two brothers and three sisters. Many road trips followed and then at some point I stopped. I took a detour, a very personal kind if I must say. Things weren’t also really doing well for me at work. During this hiatus, I continued dreaming that one day I will just hop into Christine, as I have called my ever loyal Vitara, and drive throughout the Philippines. I chose not to pursue this dream of Aparri to Jolo by land so I can take care of the circumstances I was faced then at work and personally. Looking back, road trips would have probably done me more good than harm. The Philippines by land is still on the table. I am just waiting for the right time like when I have saved enough for gasoline.I have not always been drawn to road trips. I remember hating those grueling 10-hour trips from Isabela to Manila when my lola sends me and my sister to spend summer or Christmas in the capital. Those trips were a reward of sorts for doing well in school. It's also because she didn’t want us to be left behind by the developments in Manila. She was always forward-looking and this was her way of phasing us into the next stage. Cabagan, Isabela is peaceful and convenient. I know a number of families in that sleepy town but we will soon study in Manila, which admittedly had better schools. We mostly took private vehicles during these trips and when that's not possible we rode the bus, which was more taxing. I get nauseated and even threw up in some of these trips. Later on, I came to like and look forward to these trips. Manila, after all, is glitzy and modern. So, the seed of my love affair with long drives was planted and slowly grew its roots when I took Isabela-Manila/Manila-Isabela trips with my mother's eldest brother. My uncle, who then had a Toyota Crown, shared with me stories about places that he has visited both for work and leisure. I never got the chance to go with him in his travels to these other places. Still, the experience of these trips with him took hold. His car was always clean and comfortable that it's like being home on wheels. From these trips, I picked up the practice of knocking the soles of my footwear against each other before getting into a vehicle so that I don't bring in dust, mud and pebbles. I learned to always clean the car regularly and always after a road trip. He also stops at the best places to eat, a mix of fancy and hole in the wall that serve clean and tasty dishes.
Baguio, Sagada, Vigan
The mind is a wonderful machine. It knows what its person wants even though that person is unaware of those desires. When I acquired the Vitara in 2000, road trips weren’t in my mind at all. I needed a vehicle for work. I don't mind commuting but traffic and long work hours affected my efficiency. I didn’t choose a sedan because it didn’t fit my personality. I also didn’t want a sedan because Manila gets flooded. It was a stretch on the budget but I knew the vehicle has to be brand new. I was scared of a second hand as I imagined it to be unreliable and prone to breakdowns. I also surmised I won't be able to afford a vehicle again so it should be new and sturdy that maintained devotedly will last a long time. I realized just recently that I bought a machine meant for road trips. My subconscious was already enamored with road trips 13 years ago and I had no clue. I was fortunate that my work enabled me to buy a reliable road warrior. Prior to 2013, I made two short trips to Baguio, a trip to Sagada before that and followed by a quick run to Vigan months or a year after. My dormant love affair with road trips wasn't contained long enough. This year, it broke out of the cage. Since I am still able and young, I am letting the beast run and see where it gets me. I have also picked up photography as a hobby. I am taking this seriously now than before and I realized that I am better at it when I am somewhere outside Manila, away from its so many distractions.
Alone, Photography, Home
I am alone in most of my road trips this year and it's not for lack of good companions. I enjoy travelling with a companion. You have a navigator, someone to keep you awake, someone to help you change the CD as you drive and someone to share coffee or meals with. Conversation quality is also a lot better than hanging out in a bar. And if you get engine trouble, well you have a pair of extra hands. I prefer taking long drives alone though. I tend to think better. I don’t have to worry about stopping for food. I can skip meals and it doesn’t bother me one bit. I also have more time in taking photos. I am far from mastering my camera. Four years into this hobby, taking good photos is still a hit and miss. It's very frustrating but I prefer to figure out photography on my own.I like staying home, locked up in the bedroom, buried under my books and movies. It's a small and comfortable place that while disorganized is quiet. The house is stacked with all the food and drinks I want. And should I crave something else it's quite near a number of establishments that have what I seek. The rooms I stay in my trips are comfortable only because these have elements that remind me of home. These rooms will never match the security, convenience and level of comfort of staying under the sheets on my own bed. Yet, I keep taking road trips. I have heard others says that a place you can't get out of is called a jail. I guess I leave before the house becomes a prison. Still, all my road trips had only one ending. The best part of a journey, for me, is returning home.
I am Icarus
Like Icarus to his sun, I will always be attracted by the road, ever curious where it leads, excited over what's in store before reaching its end. I am still far from flying too close to the sun that melted the wax Icarus used to bind the bird feathers and create his wings. I am aware that I might just reach that point. Should I share the fate of Icarus and never to return home, I make it a point to have no unfinished business before leaving for a trip.
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